


Somebody Catch My Breath.

by fearless_seas



Series: Breathe, we're broken people. [1]
Category: Turn (TV 2014)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, F/M, M/M, Tags will change as the story line moves, Underage Drinking, Unrequited Love, Unresolved Sexual Tension
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-08-15
Updated: 2016-10-08
Packaged: 2018-08-08 22:00:36
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,126
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7775257
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fearless_seas/pseuds/fearless_seas
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>High School is over and Anna, Abe, Caleb and Ben deal with the unwarming future of College and separation.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter One | Benjamin Tallmadge

**Author's Note:**

> Wow, okay! I was sitting at a cafe with my Mom and all the sudden this idea popped into my head- I have not been able to get it out since! I literally have the entire planned through chapter, by chapter. Just for notes- there is going to be four fanfics in his "Breathe, we're broke people" series. All four (maybe more) will feature an entire year, so this is their first year of college. I am so excited to write this, you have no idea how many plots, ideas and planning have gone into making this. If you have taken the time to start reading this- thank you, very very much. 
> 
> \- Presley.

Just like that, it was done. Ben’s eighteen years as a student of Setauket education ended in a large culmination. It was a spectacular visage. The normal foggy and inconsistent weather of Long Island seemed to disappear for the weather’s mind for the superior part of the day as the sun rose on the horizon, cutting across the sky in an aurora of magnificent mixes of yellow and orange atmospheric forms. The procession went by relatively swiftly, Ben’s back ached at the thought of the prevalent weeks of graduation practice they were forced to withstand. There were not many students in Setauket High, only approximately fifty students per grade. The ceremony was fast-paced because of the little amount of students, which resulted in the long awaited moment since they were pre-pubescents to be over before they wrapped their thoughts set.

         Three weeks before graduation it was resoundingly announced at the opening of seniors graduation preceding. “Of course, the principal and the vice principal speak first”, the speaker cleared his throat, “Next the top three academically acceding students will speech”. It was Caleb who in the procession sitting beside him, clenched his fingers with an iron grip around the other’s, the dull nail beds digging into his soft skin before they announced the valedictorian in anticipation for Ben’s shine. “Benjamin Tallmadge”. It was a position Ben was honored to have received. 

          Caleb seemed to be more excited that Ben had earned the position then Ben that he had received it. Caleb loosened his grip immediately and sprang from his seat, screaming at a thundering tone and knocking his bag to the side before laying across Ben’s lap and throwing him into a long hug, curling his arms around his neck, smiling into his ear. Ben couldn’t help but feel the rough hairs of his stubble poking against the extremity of his neck but he held on solid and wrapped his arms around the small of Caleb’s back, following the embrace. 

         Anna, who was perched on his right, rubbed circles into his lower thigh and kissed his cheek in congratulations. Abe who was shrinking in his seat at the countless pairs of orbs that were drawn in their direction and lucidly managed sputter his felicitations. Leaving a light pat on his shoulder with a weak simper. The next three weeks after the occasion were a blur as Ben struggled to push from his mind the significant date of departure Caleb had chosen. It was a dream, and Ben respected Caleb’s wishes not to attend college but travel to world. It was a tear in his heart the love Ben would miss. 

          Most others of Setauket High had already received their letters of acceptance to college. Anna received hers a month ago and screamed over the phone to Ben that she had been accepted to New York University. Abe got Columbia University (much to his Father’s glee) and Ben’s applications were still yet to be acquired. Every day Caleb’s stomach would churn when he saw Ben’s mouth secure into a firm line of apprehension while his trimmed nails would be nibbled on by his front teeth causing jagged streaks. Ben appreciated the caring flail of hands swatting his fingers from his mouth- he was biting them down almost until they bled. 

          Everyday for those three weeks, Caleb would prop his legs up against the headboard of Ben’s bed with his dark brown combat boots that were several sizes too large for him crossed above him as he listened to Ben pace his room up and down practicing his speech, hanging to every word like the edge of a cliff. Every couple of sentences his voice would stop, trailing off, and watch as Caleb’s eyelids shut- soaking in his words like melodies to the soul. He would end his sermon, pick up a red pen (always the little boy scout, Caleb joked often enough) and then flop down on his bed, which sprouted his bearded friend to flip over and lay across his chest in a messy heap, his hands behind his head relaxing. 

         “No, Ben don’t include that- nobody even knows what  _ echelon  _ means”. 

         Of course, Ben would become defensive and lift himself onto his elbows crossing out the line in a huff, not without adding a slight snap of response, “But it sounds sophisticated”. Caleb threaded his eyebrows together before Ben pursed his lips and discontinued the hasty debate. “Alright… alright…”. 

         Unexpectedly, he was not the slightest bit timorous while he stood in front of the masses of parents and students. He cleared his throat, accidentally straight into the mic causing several elderly grandparents to screech in revolt and springing Ben to jump around in embarrassment with Abe snickering in the audience. Before he began his speech with thorough pronunciation and accent, his brain barely registering the moment. When he was done, the breath he hadn’t realized he was holding in and the pressure that weighed upon his shoulders was lifted. Ben’s gown was too short and came just above the bottom of his kneecap as he rolled up the edges of it trying to find something useful to occupy his slight fear. 

          First, his eyes were disclosed away from the faces of the crowd unable to focus on a single face and drawn towards Caleb’s face which beamed like the sun itself, glowing with every ray of sure egotism, almost as if the fading rays of luminous flared across his cracked skin. Abe winked at him as he vestiged down the steps, and he swore there were tears silhouetting their way down Anna’s cheeks, moved by his melodic wording. Richard Woodhull from his poised seat cast him a blink of approvement- Richard always seemed to like him the best Abe’s friends. Ben was the only friend that asked that Ben call him Richard instead of Mr. Woodhull. It was a level of status that Anna would never achieve, unfortunately. 

          There was a final face that caused Ben to pause as he treaded on dignified footing back to his assigned seat. In the back of the crowd, the tedious sol glistened against the watery eyes of his Father. Seated in the back, wrapped in a large brown sweater that Ben’s Mother had made for him many years ago, he was clutching the gold locket that forever dangled from his neck like life itself, inside was a black and white photograph of his Mother. 

          “Find someone who will bring the light to your dark, as your Mother was to me”, as the crowd in the seats fixated their looks upon him to ask why he had froze in his advancement, he didn’t mind the attention for once as his Father’s callused fingers grinded the molding gold plating before he patted the intentional empty seat next to him- as the afternoon sun shifted to spotlight where Benjamin Tallmadge _ the first _ was seated, there was a glint of surreal composure and proudness. Tears rimmed the edges of his eyelids and as Ben returned to stare back at him, he nodded, his orbs flashing for an absorbed minute at the sky.  _ She’s here with us _ .  _ Oh Ben, she’s so proud of you _ . 

          Ben was the second of his family to graduate, Sam came first flying just centered in the grading spot but enough to get him into UC Berkeley, half way across the country. In Ben’s eighteen years living at the same Tallmadge household, he had never seen such widened expression, not one of surprise but of expectancy from his Father. There was a union of upturned chins from the last row seats of the Tallmadge’s. 

          William, who was seventeen nodded at him, the corners up his mouth upturned into an elegant smirk which caused Ben to chuckle softly. John, who would be turning fifteen in the fall swallowed in impatience, pretending to maintain his laid back form but Ben knew John’s eyes followed Ben’s lips in awe several minutes ago. Isaac, youngest of the Tallmadge household of age ten fidgeted relentlessly in his seat, smiling a wide gap toothed smile and waving his hand radically before he whispered in a voice louder than he had intended to a girl slightly older than him, “That’s  _ my  _ brother!” the girl gave him a light hearted grin before giving her older brother, who was on his phone next to her a look of absolute disgust and envy. 

          At the end of the row farthest from Ben’s Father was Sam, who had taken four days off for Ben’s graduation before he’ll be heading back to California, he sat taller than his father. While their father melted at the scrutiny that that was  _ his son _ up there, partially unable to process the reflection, Sam sat taller than any of the rest, proud to be apart of the experience he had built. It was always Ben’s Mother, his Mother who had planted the seeds of Yale into his coercive brain, his Mother who postured with him as he researched endlessly- memorizing the campus and his Mother who listened, clinging to each word of the first speech he had ever written. 

         “You could work for the president Ben, you’re simply brilliant- you know that?” 

         Back when Ben was a lanky, long limbed stature with thick black rimmed glasses framing his entrancing blue gaze and long blonde strands of hair falling in front of his eyes. “I want to be a teacher”, it was a large toothy grin from a third grader whose arms hadn’t reached the flexibility to tie the silky ribbon in his hair himself. His Mother had beamed at the idea before sticking a tongue out of her mouth and pushing a lock of hair behind his ear. 

         After his Mother died, it was Sam who took up arms. Sam who never missed a single one of his baseball games or cross country tournaments, Sam who spend endless hours on Amazon looking up “Handbook to surviving Yale” or “Geography of New Haven”. While his Mother planted the seeds of future into his sage, water it till it stole root, Sam was the one who marveled as the green leaves of support curled around his skull, soon blooming right before him into a banquet, bouquet, an aura of beautiful and breeding. Now as Ben caught out the branches of his perception the gray clouds danced together, covering the sun’s composure, he could relieve his Mother in Sam’s survey.  _ She is here. She is with us. _

         The wind began to pick up and several people screeched and chased their hats across the football field, Ben’s eyes caught his Mother in all of his family. In his Father there was a love deep and unruly, unforgotten, unchanged as his eyes lit up at Ben’s glory, Ben knew that his Father saw standing there in the rows, his shoes digging into the muddy grass, he knew his Father saw his Mother. The Tallmadge boys all lined up in the plastic seats, Ben’s blue orbs ran down the row all leading to his Father like twins. There were the black sheeps. Ben and Isaac who inherited their Mother’s childish looks. Ben and John who were supplied their Mother’s strong composure. Ben and William who’s blonde locks swirled, framing their faces from their Mother’s flare of hair. Ben and Sam whose smile lit up the room and laugh that was modest, honest. 

         The interception of his mouth coiled up without force, the wind was onsetting- unraveling the loose blonde braid ringleted down the base of his neck to the arch, the blonde hair freeing, cascading down his back. The empty seat at the end of the row, next to his Father was now filled. A transparent person, their long curly blonde hair was spilled across their shoulders, lips pink and colored naturally opened to sync a set of laughter as her legs danced with light hearted glee and toes dug into the grass in a childish manner. Firm chin, blue eyes, brown as sweet melting chocolate, Sam’s eyes, Isaac’s eyes. Tongue threatened to tie as he swallowed the knot building in his throat.  _ She’s here, she’s with us, she’s so proud of you Ben _ . And Ben knew as the women faded leaving him with one last waft of her cherry scented perfume and he was left to return to his assigned seat that his Mother was here. His Mother was in all of them. The sun faded and the rain pooled from the sky, he closed his eyes before pulling off his shoes and digging his feet into the soil. 

  
_  I’m so proud of you, Ben. _


	2. Chapter Two | Benjamin Tallmadge.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Caleb and Ben have too much sexual tension. Will Strong has gotta stop taking so many damn photos. Meet Caleb's younger sisters.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this chapter took so long! I was on a roll with this story and then I decided a different course of action. But I've got all the plots in order. And that's why I never have writers block. I can't write a story unless I've planned every single chapter out 
> 
> \- Presley.

__ Before his speech, the day seemed to blur into a surreal fixation. It wasn’t until after his realization, as the sky clouded above them that the day seemed to speculate onto certain details. The firmament lamented intoxicately with rain, they did not move the procession inside but simply throughout the pouring rain announced the students names as hair and makeup was completely destroyed. Nobody seemed to care that their tailored suits they had spent hours sizing for were turned into darker shades in the foggy haze. 

         After the names were read, caps were tossed in the air and tears were shed; Anna cloaked her arms around Abe’s neck, kissing him roughly until he was lit up like bittersweet magenta. Caleb tossed his boots off into the field, the shoelaces tied together and cupped Ben’s hips, hugging himself close to his body and dancing with him. Ben’s bare feet slid against the cold, saturated mud and his toes became numb. He didn’t care while he twirled Caleb around in a circle, their merriment filling the courtyard. There was a contagious shroud of ecstasy as the pain was flying from their shoulders as Ben knew that there was no place he’d rather be. Switching off, he twinged in Anna for a promenade and she curtsied her gown before Ben grabbed her lower stomach teasingly and lifted her into the air. 

        “Let me down, Ben!”, snickering forte as Caleb and Abe wrestled on the ground; Ben knew Anna didn’t mean it. 

          When Ben let Anna to the ground she unbuckled her heels, casting them aside before melting into another sweaty kiss with Abe. It was another opportunity as Caleb immediately mantled his fingers around Ben’s waist were still hovering in the air. Ben’s slender arms wrapped around the smaller's waist before dipping Caleb to the ground unexpectedly. Caleb cocked an eyebrow and chuckled, their eyes met in the center. Tension wrapped like a present in the middle. 

          “Who knew Tallboy could dance?” he swallowed, almost intimidatingly. 

          A simper sneaked its way, parting his lips slightly, he didn’t respond but felt their lips brushing against each other- neither of them making a move. Caleb’s tongue licked the rain off his own lips, his curls thrown back. Ben could sense the next movement from a mile away as Caleb was so close he could count Ben’s eyelashes and watched as they flickered contrast to his pale cheeks. His long eyelashes fluttered to brush the drizzle that was clouding their vision. 

          It was a small shove and as Ben’s eyes began to shut and Caleb tilted his head up, their noses collided as if they fit together like puzzle pieces entertaining another’s fate. The shove evolved into a push and when Ben unfurled his eyes he was secular in the brown mud, hovering above Caleb. There was mechanical laughter hollering in the background as Abe shrieked in delight. 

          “You should seen your face when you fell Ben!”. Caleb’s gown became matted brown on the back, Ben’s arm was uncomfortably stuck underneath the smaller man’s weight, but Ben would stay uncomfortable for as long as it took if it meant he could stay this close to Caleb. 

         Anna slugged Abe’s shoulder and he shrieked loudly, giving her a look of betrayal, “What the  _ hell  _ was that for?”. Anna didn’t reply but coughed, as she flashed a disapproving look and gesturing her chin at the almost hypnotizing way the two who had fallen on each other, who were staring intently. Caleb made the first move and rolled out from underneath Ben, brushed off the stray grass on the front of his gown before offering a hand down to him, who bit his lip and stood up. 

         “Jesus Tallboy!” he smothered. Ben cycled his vision and barraged an arm around his shoulder, heaving him to his side. The near kiss was still fresh in his mind, _he wanted Caleb to kiss him,_ an appetite for his lips _,_ he reflection offhandedly as he crossed the grass to where Sam was standing angled impatiently with a camera strung around his neck. 

 

⚀⚁⚂⚃⚄⚅

 

         It seemed to be merely hours later, the rain had since ended and the heavens above were glowed up like Christmas lights as an early sunset began to settle over the East. Even more photographs were taken by the parents. Anna’s father, Will was especially the enthusiastic, shoving the four together and snapshotting a picture of nearly every single moment. Richard Woodhull seemed distance, and only a few seconds earlier had patted Ben on the back and given him a tight smile. It was inevitable that he had hopped Abe had taken his spot, although he never seemed to expect much from his son. 

         Thomas strided over to congratulate Ben on becoming valedictorian, partially proclaiming himself for the credit, as he was also valedictorian of his class four year earlier, his college graduation was seldom weeks away. Woodhull Sr. was not letting anyone forget that fact. It seemed that Ben was always able to get along better with Thomas then Abe intimated too, even though the two were brothers. It wasn’t as if Ben intended for sparks of intelligent conversation to light up between the two, but somehow Thomas and Ben always divulged into deep conversations. Constantly, Anna’s Father, Will screamed at the crowd of four to form into another formation. Thomas provided gifts for them in between uncomfortable photographs. 

         In the large group a spring of rationalization jolted his person as he surveyed the mass of adults and his classmates. Mindless beam creeped onto his visage as glance caught the site of Caleb chasing Isaac who was giggling across the run, Caleb always got along well with his younger brothers. The same for Ben towards Caleb’s younger sisters-

          “Hey, Ben!”, Ben spun around. Tearing his eyes off of Caleb and the ripping horizon, keeping him in the corner of his vision before gazing at whoever was before him. A short girl in a pink dress, short shoulder length hair fringed at the edges. When she smiled, the creases at the corners of her eyes gave light, beauty. 

         Ben allowed a grin on his face before reaching forward to blanketed his arms around the shorter girl. She came just above his waist and stole her arms around his torso, burying the side of her cheek into his stomach. Ann Brewster was a replica of her older brother. It was quite a marvel to Ben whenever he stepped into the home of the Brewster’s how they all seemed to match. All short, thick shoulders and loud bellied, a smile that lit up the world in a heartbeat; dark brown hair matted thickly to their heads, matched with warm pools of chocolate below their brows, the kind you wanted to swim in. 

         Ann loosened her grip around Ben’s abdomen, not taking a step back for space but staring up at him with a large grin plastered into her cheeks. “Hey Ann, how are you?”, Ben placed hand on her shoulder (he had a arch his back down a little bit). 

         The wind tussled her hair to the side and she frowned, sticking out her tongue. “The ceremony was quite boring”, her thick characterizing eyebrows knitted firmly together at the center of her forehead. “But-” she allowed her frown to peel away and a look of pride colored her cheeks, “-I’m happy for you Ben!”.

         A tiny tingle vibrated around his heart and he thought if he was a normal person he would teared up slightly in this indication. His shoulders slumped as if he was influencing pressure atop his blades. His lips peeled back to reveal his white teeth before chattering them in fake worry. “Thanks Ann”, mustering all of the joy he could from himself. 

         “Caleb says you haven’t gotten your acceptance letter yet”, her gaze tumbled to Ben’s knees and he was tempted to see if there was a stain or something. Ann was always one to be outright, calculating. One feisty eleven year old. 

         The unsettling pang of anxiety fluttered in his stomach with wings and he suddenly felt dizzy again. The ground was to be a lot farther as his shoes de-amplified modest with the lack of oxygen. His head palpitated, hair loosening from his braid that was neatly ringleted together at the base of his neck, “No, I haven’t”, an unnerving respire escaped his throat. 

         Ann glimpsed up, brushed a stray brown curl behind her ear, the shells of her ears stuck out, Ann had a mild childish feel to her. “No need to worry, I know you have gotten in”, a reassurance that Ben needed. The cavity of his chest wavered. 

         “If you go, how am I supposed to paint your nails?”, she smirked, raising a hand up to him and showing him her nails which were newly painted a bright pink. If Ben looked close enough, he’d be able to see reminisce of a navy blue, just hidden at the creases of his own nail beds. Ben didn’t have any sisters, which made him wonder how he was so good with Caleb’s younger siblings. 

          As soon as Ben stepped foot in Caleb’s house, there was always a large chorus of feet stomping down the stairs to greet him; Caleb at the back of the pack of course, marveling at his sister's stealing away Ben. Orpha’s nifty little hands were always spent winding together braid, after braid, after braid, of Ben’s dirty blonde hair. There was always mutters of, “Such beautiful hair, it’s so soft”, behind his ear as she worked. As if on response to this thought, a hand raised to wrap a piece of his hair around his finger. 

         Ben shrugged it off, “You’ll be alright- you have Marshall remember?”. Ann immediately stuck out a tongue in contradiction, “He doesn’t even talk to any of us anymore”, a roll of her eyes was added for dramatization. “Teenagers”.

         A chuckle escaped his lips took his eyes off of Ann for a minute to look behind her, “Where are the other two?” he asked, gaze settling again on Ann who was rubbing a thumb down her collarbone, worry lines marking red across her skin. She sucked in her cheek in question before realizing that Ben was talking about the other Brewster sisters

         Ann tipped her chin to the side, as if pointing and Ben followed the pivot, Orpha Brewster’s mouth was wide as Ben squinted his eyes to follow the blurry figure. Her white dress trailed behind her in an angelic manner and a loud echo of laughter erupted from across the field as Ben managed to see his youngest brother chasing her, wet stringy blonde hair was matted to his forehead. A tiny mince of proud deliverance peaked the corners of his mouth.  

         It came by surprise, a large grin widened up Ann’s visage and behind Ben, a shorter body slammed into him with a large cry, “Ben!”. Ben spun around, the arms were still tightly wrapped around his waist and nestled his arms back down at his sides again when the shock washed away. 

         “Hey, Eli”, the face that dug their sharp chin into his hip bone soon looked up to face him. Elizabeth Brewster was the eldest daughter of the Brewster home. Twelve in age, a feisty like Ann. She bore a head of long curly hair and large brown eyes that blinked up in admiration, pointed chin and crows feet that crinkled around her eyes when she smiled. Eli snapped her neck to the side and gave Ann a disapproving look, fighting for the attention. 

         “I still can’t believe that she cut her hair short! Annie looks like a boy!” the curly haired preteen’s cheek glided up on her face. A foot away, Ann rubbed the back of her arm, her cheeks flushing a pink tint and fingers stressfully tugged at a lock of hair that was too short to hide behind her ear. 

         Guilt shaded him in colors. “I think it looks beautiful”, it was Eli’s turn to look embarrassed as Ben’s approval made Ann’s chest sing with pride. 

         “I’m going to miss you so much, Ben”.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I honestly hate this chapter! It's so poorly written but, yeah, finally got around to updating. I lost my mojo on this story for a little bit. This chapter has been written up for about two months, only now got around to editing it. Notes:  
> \- Caleb and Ben aren't dating. :(  
> \- If you caught on, Anna and Abe are dating.   
> \- Ben and Anna treat each other like brother and sister. Caleb and Anna do too.   
> \- Richard Woodhull acts like he likes Ben more than his own son, Abe.   
> \- Thomas Woodhull (Abe's older brother) is 22, and graduating college. He goes to Columbia.   
> \- Anna Strong's father was named William Woodhull, and I just decided that everyone shortens his name to Will.   
> \- Will loves his daughter Anna, like a lot. There is no separating these two.   
> \- I did some research on all their families and Caleb apparently had three younger sisters named Elizabeth (Eli), Ann and Orpha. Did some math on the years they were born and is Caleb in 18 right now, then Elizabeth is twelve, Ann is eleven and Orpha is nine. Caleb Brewster also had a brother, whose name was Benjamin Brewster, but Caleb's father is also named Benjamin Brewster and just to make it less confusing- I decided that Caleb's Father's name is Simon Brewster and his brother (who is fourteen) is Marshall Brewster.   
> \- Caleb's sisters love Ben so much. Ben's brothers loves Caleb so much. 
> 
> \- Presley.

**Author's Note:**

> The titles of the chapters are usually lyrics in songs I'm listening too on shuffle. Also, so I know the acceptance rate of New York University is only 6%, but just kinda forget that. Abraham Woodhull went to Kings College- which is today called Columbia University. Benjamin Tallmadge went to Yale, and Yale is still called Yale. For Caleb Brewster I had always had the mindset that Caleb was a traveler and since he's struggling with his feelings for Ben that he's trying to run away from possibly getting his heart broken, to me it just makes since that he traveled after High School to clear his mind. To me, Caleb seems more like someone to go to South America, Australia or Africa- but I know a lot about European geography so it's slightly easier for me. Europe seems more like the kind of place Caleb might take Ben someday. Everything I wrote about Ben's family is true, Ben did have that many siblings (all brothers) and his Mother died when he was fourteen. The only thing Turn got incorrect was the fact that Ben's only older sibling was named William and he was the one who died in 1776, Ben had a younger sibling named Samuel. I just sorta switched their names for confusions sake.


End file.
